Happy Earth Day, all. I feel so appreciated.
It appears Earth Day has become yet another way to sell more stuff. Huzzah. At the train station, Colleen from Clear Channel handed me a green “Commuter Appreciation Day” shopping bag stuffed with coupons and product samples. Subway, the Harlem Globetrotters, Vaseline, etc all let me know how much they appreciate my ‘green’ commute by handing out discounts.
I’m glad for the appreciation, because we’re all about to die. A little earlier this morning, Tom sat across the aisle from me on the bus warning me of impending doom. The sea level has already risen eight inches this morning in San Francisco Bay because of the glacier melt from “that volcano in Greenland” (8 inches!! Read up on tides and ocean swell, Tom).
Volcanic lightning at Eyjafjallajokul (“There’s photographic proof!“) portends cataclysmic geomagnetic reversal, and volcanoes will soon erupt in Australia (the antipode of Iceland, according to Tom, though Tom used smaller words and more profane language).
Iceland Greenland and Australia will swap places, which means they’ll need to rename the Tour Down Under. This also makes travel to the 2012 Tour de France much easier for the Fly V Australia pro team, and Giro d’Italia organizers are already talking about a Giro Prologue in Reykjavik, New South Wales.
I told Tom that he needed to keep it quiet, but I’m on my way to work at the NASA Ames Research Center in Mountain View on a top secret project to drill to the earth’s core. We’re using an unobtainium boring machine and nuclear explosives to set things right. Rest easy and know the government has it all under control.
The big Earthday bike news today is probably the grand opening of B-Cycle bike share in Denver, Colorado with 400 bikes at dozens of locations. Several news outlets covered the story: The Denver Post, BR&IN,/a>, CNET, 5280 Magazine. Bloggers mentioing the action include Urban Velo, Bike Denver, Big Green Boulder, Uncluttered White Space, Bike Hugger, and Cyclelicious.
Ask BikePortland: What’s with the racer vs commuter vibe?
The German businessman pictured below was one of thousands of travelers stranded by European flight restrictions due to that volcano in Australia. He tried boarding the ferry from Dover to get home to his Frau, but foot passenger tickets were sold out. He bought the bicycle for a handful of Euros and as a bike owner he technically counts as a vehicle driver.
Eco Velo lists some good REI beginner bike videos.
Michael in Santa Cruz recounts his experience bicycling through volcanic ash in Alaska. “That ash is incredibly gritty, and, mixed with water, gets in every gear, cog and chain link on the bike,” he writes. “It wears down metal so quickly you can almost see it disappear.”
My next project at NASA Ames after we save the world: Using unobtanium to make volcano proof bike parts so Fly V can continue to train in spite of the ash clouds.
Happy Earth Day, all. I appreciate you!